Reclaiming power through choice

Reclaiming power through choice

Sometimes healing takes us into the most unexpected places.

My client Monika (shared with her consent) has lived with complex ptsd since childhood, shaped by years of caring responsibilities, bullying, abuse and assault. These experiences had deeply eroded her self-worth and her sense of agency.

Yet, in this season of her life, Monika is determined to recover and live as fully as she can. To mark the anniversary of her husband’s death the only person she had ever felt truly safe with she chose to do something bold. Something she never would have imagined herself doing. She booked a tandem skydive. But this was not just about the jump. Monika wanted to create a ritual around the event, which also fell on a full moon and total eclipse. Her intentions were to reclaim her body, invite lightness back into her life, and step into her power.

One part of the ritual was to write down these intentions, burn them, and release the ashes during the jump. But as the moment approached, anxiety rose. What if the ashes blew in their faces? What if she couldn’t reach her pocket? Was she about to ruin the ritual?

And then another voice arose. It said, It’s your ritual. You can change it.

So she did. She jumped, felt fearless and free, and later walked to a secluded waterfall where she released the ashes into the rushing water.

Instead of feeling she had “messed it up” an old, familiar belief, she trusted her instinct and created an ending that was just as powerful.

This shift mattered. Months of practising trauma-sensitive yoga had helped Monika learn that she alone decides what to do with her body.

She can change a shape if it doesn’t feel right. Her needs matter.

That learning translated into this real-world moment. And there was another piece too, skydiving meant placing her safety in the hands of a man she had just met, strapped closely to him. She had to tune in to her felt sense is this safe? And her body said yes. She trusted him. And he kept her safe.

These may look like small steps from the outside. But for someone whose life has been shaped by abuse and coercion, they are gigantic.

Monika came away from this experience beaming: “This was so gigantic!” she said. Healing does not look one way. Sometimes it looks like pausing in a yoga shape. Sometimes it looks like saying no, and sometimes it looks like flying through the sky, and landing with a new sense of freedom.

Could you take a moment to reflect:

Where in your own life are you ready to reclaim choice?

Further reading: RESEARCH INTO THE EFFICACY OF TRAUMA SENSITIVE YOGA